Mark Vonnegut Pediatrics

What you can do to better communicate with your doctor

• Speak up if you want your doctor to make eye contact. This means the doctor looks at you rather than at a computer or someone else. Tell the doctor if you prefer that you both sit down when talking.
• Ask your doctor to repeat back what you just said. That helps make sure that he or she clearly understands you.
• After your appointment, call the doctor's office if you have questions or concerns. You might ask to meet again with the doctor, either in person or by phone. Find out if there is someone else in the office you should speak with instead.
• Speak up about topics that matter most to you. For instance, if your doctor is talking a lot about reasons for a treatment, speak up if you would rather hear more about its side effects.
• Say something if you think your doctor is not being respectful. For instance you might say, "I feel like you are not really listening to me."
• Make a list of questions and concerns before meeting with your doctor. Bring this list to your appointment and refer to it while talking with the doctor. You might also bring a pencil or pen to write notes about what was discussed.

What your doctor can do to better communicate with you

• Your doctor should clearly explain medical problems. This includes:
• What your medical problem is, or might be.
• How he or she plans to diagnose this problem.
• What you can do to care for this problem at home.
• What kind of medicine to take, along with how much and how often to take it.
• When you can expect to start feeling better.

• Your doctor should pay close attention to what you say. He or she may repeat back what you said, or ask more questions. Your doctor will likely also write notes in your chart or enter information in the computer about what you discussed.
• Your doctor should show respect. This means that he or she asks about and respects your feelings, beliefs, and values when it comes to treatment and care.

Communicating Better With Your Doctor

Working With Office Staff

What to expect from your doctor's office about access to care

• Your doctor's office should have a system to schedule appointments. This system should also have times when patients can call for medical advice or help.
• Doctor's office staff should tell you if the doctor will be late for your appointment.
• Doctor's offices should keep open times in the schedule for patients without appointments who need urgent care.

Working With Office Staff

What You Can Do

• Talk with the doctor about your child’s weight and eating habits. Let the doctor know if you think your child is eating too much, eating too little, or showing signs of other eating problems. The doctor might refer your child to a certified nutritionist, registered dietician, or other medical specialist.
• Talk with the doctor about your child’s physical activity. This includes how much and what type of sports and active play your child does each day. When children get enough physical activity they are more likely to stay at a healthy weight, have strong bones and muscles, be less stressed, and feel more confident.
• Tell your child’s doctor if there are problems at home. These include whether someone in your home is sick, out of work, having money troubles, or not getting along with others. Problems at home can affect your child’s health and safety. Your child’s doctor can talk about ways to get help. 

What Your Doctor Can Do

• Your child’s doctor should talk about safety at home. Accidents and injuries are a leading cause of death and disability among children of all ages. Your child’s doctor should discuss poison control, car seats, seat belts, bicycle helmets, sport safety, and safe gun storage.
• The doctor should ask about your child’s physical activity. The doctor may also talk about ways children like to be active. When children get enough physical activity they are more likely to stay at a healthy weight, have strong muscles and bones, feel less stressed, and pay attention at school.
• Your child’s doctor should ask how much time your child spends in front of a computer or TV (“screen time”). When children have too much screen time they are more likely to be overweight, sleep poorly, have less time for play, and have trouble paying attention at school.
• The doctor should discuss types of food your child should eat each day. This includes foods, drinks, and snacks that are healthy and help children grow.
• Your child’s doctor should ask about problems at home. These include whether someone in your home is sick, out of work, having money troubles, or not getting along with others. Problems at home can affect your child’s health and safety. Your child’s doctor can talk about ways to get help. 

What you can do to improve self-management support

• Make a list of questions and concerns before meeting with your doctor. Bring this list to your appointment and refer to it while talking with the doctor. You should also bring a pencil or pen, or smartphone or tablet, to write notes about what was discussed.
• Ask your doctor to repeat back what you just said. That helps make sure that he or she clearly understands you.
• Discuss your values and beliefs that could affect treatment. For instance, tell your doctor if you would refuse blood products or do not want certain tests. Learn everything you would like to know about treatment choices including benefits (how treatments can help) and risks (problems that treatments can cause).
• Talk about your living situation. Tell your doctor if you care for someone at home, or if you live with someone who cares for you.
• Make a plan with your doctor to manage your health conditions and follow the plan. This plan should include exercise, what to eat, medicines you take, appointments, and other activities that can help you stay healthy.
• After your appointment, call the doctor's office if you have questions or concerns. You might ask to meet again with the doctor, either in person or by phone. Find out if there is someone else in the office you should speak with instead.
• Go to all of your doctor's appointments, even if you are feeling well. If you an ongoing health problem, such as diabetes or asthma, you may need to go to the doctor at least once a year, if not more, to monitor your health and to learn self-management techniques to stay healthy.
• Learn about your health problems. Ask your doctor for more information. He or she might give your booklets to read or suggest certain websites, such as health.gov/myhealthfinder. 

What your doctor’s office can do to improve self-management support*

• Your doctor may ask you questions and listen closely to your answers and concerns to better help you.
• Your doctor can work with you to write an action plan. This plan may include how to take your medicines, a list of foods and physical activity to help you keep healthy, and what to do if are not feeling well.
• Your doctor may talk with you about how to manage your health and stay healthy. The doctor may give you fact sheets or booklets to read or suggest certain websites to help you to learn more about taking care of your health problems. The doctor should review these items with you and ask if you have any questions.

*adapted from AHRQ’s Self-management Support webpage

Working With Office Staff

What you can do to help doctors know you better

• Discuss your health history. This includes past health problems along with current or chronic conditions (such as diabetes or heart problems).
• Talk about your family's medical history. This means the health of your 'blood relatives' including parents, grandparents, sisters, brothers, aunts, and uncles. It can be hard to remember all this. You can help by bringing notes about your family's medical history.
• Tell your doctor about all the prescription drugs you take. Also discuss any vitamins, herbs, remedies, supplements, or over-the-counter medications (such as aspirin or cough medicine) that you use.
• Speak up if you think that a doctor, nurse, or office staff has confused you with someone else. Make sure they are looking at your medical records, not someone else's.
• Discuss your values and beliefs that could affect treatment. For instance, tell your doctor if you would refuse blood products or do not want certain tests. Learn as much as you want to know about treatment choices including benefits (how treatments can help) and risks (problems that treatments can cause).
• Talk about your living situation. Tell your doctor if you care for someone at home, or if you live with someone who cares for you.

What your doctor can do to know you better

• Your doctor should ask about your medical history and current health problems. The first time your doctor meets with you, he or she should ask about your medical history and that of your family. In future visits, your doctor should update your medical history with any new health problems and treatments.
• Your doctor should have a system that makes it easy to find your health records. This is needed whether the doctor meet with you in the office, talks with you by phone, or consults with specialists about your treatment and care.
• When making choices about treatment, your doctor should talk about treatment benefits (how it can help) and risks (problems this treatment may cause).
• Your doctor should ask what matters to you. This includes your values and beliefs about treatments, care, and desired results. Your doctor should take the time to learn this when you first meet.

How Well Does Your Doctor Know You?

What You Can Do

• Ask what to expect as your child gets older. This includes at what age your child should be walking, talking, and reading.
• Tell the doctor if you have concerns with your child’s growth and development. You know best how your child is growing and learning. Talk with the doctor if you are worried about any problems and if so, how to help.
• Talk with the doctor about how your child behaves. Let the doctor know if your child seems to have problems such as hitting, crying a lot, or being afraid of others. Talk with the doctor about what to do when your child behaves this way.

What Your Doctor Can Do

• Measure and weigh your child. The doctor will show you a growth chart that compares your child’s height and weight to others of the same age. The doctor should talk about what to expect and if there are any problems with your child's height and weight.
• The doctor will also check whether your child is overweight. One way is with a BMI (body mass index) that measures both height and weight. If your child is overweight then the doctor may refer your child to a certified nutritionist or registered dietician.
• Talk about what to expect as your child grows. This includes changes as children age as well as problems that might occur. If there are problems with how your child is growing or developing the doctor should talk with you about what to do.
• Talk with you about how your child is learning and behaving at school and at home.
• Talk and play with your child. The doctor needs to communicate with your child too. This helps your child feel more comfortable with the doctor. It also helps the doctor see how your child plays, learns, speaks and moves. 

Experiences With Your Child's Doctor

How Parents Can Work with Doctors to Improve Their Child's Health

What your provider can do to build trust

• Your provider should foster a culture of open communication. This includes encouraging patients to share their concerns, questions, and preferences openly. Additionally, it involves acknowledging patients’ perspectives and concerns with empathy, respect, and cultural humility.
• Your provider should actively listen. Providers should practice active listening during appointments, giving patients the time and space to express themselves fully and ensuring their thoughts are understood.
• Your provider should provide clear and transparent information. This includes information about diagnoses, treatment options, and potential outcomes.
• Your provider should consistently follow-up. Your provider should establish a reliable system for follow-up, demonstrating commitment to monitoring patient progress, addressing concerns, and adapting treatment plans as needed.

What you can do to build trust with your provider

Be open and honest. Share relevant information about your medical history, lifestyle, and concerns openly. Complete transparency enables your healthcare provider to make well-informed decisions tailored to your unique needs.

• Engage in shared decision-making. Collaborate with your provider in the decision-making process regarding your health care. Discuss treatment options, potential risks, and benefits, ensuring that decisions align with your values and preferences.
• Provide feedback constructively. Offer constructive feedback to your healthcare provider. Share your thoughts on what communication styles (e.g., maintaining eye contact) work best for you and express any concerns you may have regarding your treatment or overall care experience.
• Schedule regular check-ins. A proactive approach allows for ongoing discussions about preventive care and any emerging concerns, strengthening the patient-provider relationship over time.